Sunday's Thankful Moments (01-23-11)

It's almost been a week since I've been doing the grateful/thankful moments and I feel good about that. I just need to do better about doing it earlier so that I can do to bed at a decent hour. With that said, on with today's list. 

1. Today, I'm grateful that I saw my niece today in church and I got an "I Love You" tweet from my oldest niece. I wish I could spend more time with both of them. 
2. Today, I'm grateful that I have a pastor who's worried about my well being. After church today, he mentioned to me about how he thought I wouldn't make it to church because I was up late. But I was there (yes, I was running late but I got there in time to march in with the choir) in church, in place, in praise. 
3. Today, I am thankful for the Word that I heard at church today. It gave me what I needed to do what I had to do this evening. 
4. Today, I'm grateful for my relationship with my cousin. We talked today and it was cool. I wish I could spend more time with her too. 
5. Today, I'm grateful for another day that I'm not a member of the DDS and/or DMS. My mom gave me some chicken wings from KFC today and I was able to watch the last half of the football game with my dad.

My life is about simple things and moments. Everything doesn't always go that way all the time but I am grateful for the simple things and simple moments. Thank you Lord for the simple things that make this not so simple person happy. 

Five Things I am Grateful/Thankful for (01-22-11)

Can I just say, I couldn't wait until it was time to blog. I had a helluva a day. Blog time means it's also almost bedtime which means, whatever happened the day before doesn't have any impact on the day I will have when I wake up and believe me I had a day today. I want to blog about it, you wanna hear (read) it, here it goes. 

1. Today, I am thankful that I received a phone call from my brother today. I hadn't really talked to him in some time and for him to provide some real insight was completely amazing . I do miss him and talking to him was more helpful than he could ever realize. 
2. Today, I am thankful for tears, because they are more cleansing than anything. They may look hideous when they fall, but their beauty is far beyond comprehension. 
3. Today, I am truly grateful for my California living. Today it was in the mid 60s in the middle of January. While most people I know are complaining about snow, ice and whatever - we got SUNSHINE!
4. Today, I am grateful for friends and family who say what they need to say and listen when they need to listen but do both (in most cases) with YOUR best interests in mind. No one likes to see you sad, hurt or mad. The truth of the matter is that you don't like feeling that way anyway. 
5. Today, like days before, I am grateful for another day that I am not a member of the DDS and/DMS. Until my dad comes home, I will say this probably everyday. 
6. **BONUS** I am soooooooooooo grateful that a situation is being removed from my life. Definitely not what or how I wanted things to happen but I know that God's already working my situation out for me and I will trust Him to do so. He doesn't make mistakes and He gives you what you need and not what you want. And for THAT I am grateful. 

Thank you Lord for keeping me safe from harm and safe from myself. 

Friday's (01-21-11) Thankful/Grateful Moments

Well today was a little interesting. My two co-workers who keep me entertained at work were not there today, which made for a very quiet time at work. Speaking of work, let me begin my list: 

1. Today, I am thankful that my boss told me that all the jobs were safe in my department at work. That is a sigh of relief from OE. 
2. Today, I am thankful that I got to talk to my sister and my niece for over an hour. I do miss my sister and my niece, even though I know my sister is nuts. 
3. Today, I was grateful to be able to hang out with one of my home girls that I hadn't hung out with since last year (like October/November). We went to go support my godsister who did an amazing job tonight. 
4. Today, I'm thankful that I'm not caught up in some major drama. Point. Blank. Period. 
5. Today (just like the days before), I am grateful to not be a member of the DDS and/or DMS. I found out the someone had stage four cancer, had a tumor removed, only to have it come back two years later. That could easily be me. And I'm thankful/grateful that it's not. 

Thank you Lord, for all you've done, you will do and are doing right now. 

Thursday's (01-20-11) Thankful/Grateful List

Today had some bumps in it. There are things that are becoming more clear as I have gotten older. And I promise I am going to really go in on what marriage should mean. But enough of that....on to today's list. 

1. Today, I started the day completely silly. It made the day pretty interesting in a good way. Laughter is good for grown ups. 
2. Today, I ran into someone who wants to help me do big things in the future. Don't worry boo, we'll have time to work that out.
3. Tonight me and Patrice went to the basketball game and were back to our usual antics. It was a little weird not being in our normal seats but I was happy to be back after the Stanford game and the Kansas debacle. 
4. Today I cranked out 3 blogs (including this one). That's pretty impressive. And I'm actually going to do another blog for the sole purpose of exposing foolishness I see in the streets. (That might be the name, I'm still working out the name and the details. With my luck, I'm sure I'll have tons of ammo)
5. Today was another day that I wasn't a member of the DDS and/or the DMS. Dad called me and sounded completely unhappy but there wasn't anything that I could do about it. 
6. ***BONUS*** Today I actually applied some of what JP talked about regarding sphere of influence. THAT was very encouraging. I didn't stress over things that I had no control over. That was a pretty good thing. And it felt good too. I put this as a bonus because it relates to #5

In my best Ice Cube voice, today was a good day. Thank you Lord. I know it didn't have to be so. 

May Be Debuting A New Blog

So I was talking to my partner in crime, trying to get some buy in from her about doing another blog. When she and I go out, we almost always see some foolishness. Maybe it's where we go, maybe we attract the foolishness, either way, we seem to attract tons of foolishness in the streets. I was trying to get her in on it but then I think about it, there are some silly things that I see when I'm not with her. Working in Berkeley, I always see something just hella crazy. So I'm thinking about doing a new blog, Foolishness I see in the streets. What do ya'll think?

Wednesday's (01-19-11) Thankful/Grateful List

Can I just say that I am really trying to make this a habit? This is one of the last things I've done for the night for 3 nights in a row! (I struggle with developing good habits so I mark this as a minor accomplishment). Here's tonight's thankful/grateful list:

1. I'm grateful that today was a better day. Even if I did over sleep and still get to work 20 mins after I said I would, it was a great day. 
2. I'm grateful that I share a cubicle with a guy who makes me laugh by just being him and have a best friend who is the extreme opposite of you and you love her anyway. Imagine if you will, a young 26 year old Korean kid taking 5 singles out of his pocket and making it rain in the cubicle. If it's not funny to you, don't worry. The shit is hilarious to me. As for the BFF, she and I were talking about how frustrating it is to come home from work and you see someone in your house with their feet propped up. It's even more frustrating when they ask you what's for dinner like they haven't been sitting there doing a whole lot of nothing. My foolio BFF said that she would do like Kathy Bates in Misery and take a sledgehammer to the ankles. Now if that isn't funny to you, then maybe you shouldn't be reading my blog anyway.
3. I'm grateful/thankful for LW telling me to fill out the FMLA paperwork. That made it pretty easy for me to leave and go see my father who was having a moment in the middle of the day, without having to worry about anything later. 
4. I'm grateful that I was able to get laundry done and go to bible study tonight. AND I found Old Faithful which will make it's way into this week's wardrobe either tomorrow or Friday. Bible study was nice tonight. It was refreshing to go and read the Word and feel a little bit better about some things. I'm trying to do better. Bare with me. 
5. I'm thankful for another day that I'm not a member of the DDS and/or DMS. One of my former co-workers joined the society today. I don't know all the details but my heart does go out to him and his family. The last couple of blogs I've posted this as something on the list because I know that this can change at a moment's notice. Today I was able to go to the hospital and see my dad, have a discussion with his doctor, nurse and case worker, update my mom on the situation, go to their house, use their washer and dryer and have a conversation with my mom about Law and Order: SVU. Sometimes it's just the simple things and I am thankful for those simple things.

Thanks God. Now let me go to bed so that I can be close to on time to work tomorrow. 

Five Things I Am Thankful/Grateful For (01-18-11)

So I'm slipping into a bad place right now and I need to find ways to keep me from going there. With that said, here's tonight's I'm thankful/grateful list:

1. Today, I am thankful that Jeremy Dante' explained Tumblr to me. I know that seems real small but he was pretty genuine when he came to my desk to explain something that I asked him on Twitter. Kinda dorky but completely up my dorky alley.
2. Today, I am grateful to find out that tonight's episode of NCIS is already online. Oh snap *snap*
3. I'm grateful today that my dad's best friend asked me what was wrong and seemed really concerned that I was unhappy/sad. She didn't do anything out of the ordinary, she just cared which is what I needed. 
4. Today was another day that I am not a member of the DDS or the DMS, for that I'm grateful. 
5. Today we had some new faces at tonight's alumni meeting. That was a good thing. 

After NCIS goes off, I'm gonna go to bed, but check to see if The Good Wife is online. If it is, I might watch that, then go to bed. Tomorrow's hump day...another day to be grateful and thankful for. 

The 5 Things I'm Grateful For (01-17-11)

In the midst of my frustrations, I realize that there are lots of things for me to be grateful for. As I just signed off of Facebook for the night, I'll keep this brief so that I can get to bed in a timely fashion.

The Five Things I'm Grateful/Thankful for today:

1. Today I woke up on this side of the living, was able and clothed in my right mind for the whole day.
2. Today, I got to interact with a lot of inspiring young African American teens who are on the journey for a higher education. Hopefully the ones that touched will at least apply to Howard. If not, I still gave them something to think about. 
3. Despite getting lost and frustrated, I made it to MoAD in the city and back. My car stayed in one place which is many things to be thankful for within itself. 
4. Today, I was productive. Even though I didn't get everything I wanted to do done, I got some things done and got them in motion. 
5. Today was another day that I wasn't a member of the DDS or DMS. Even though I was a little frustrated that my dad's back in the hospital, the reason wasn't as serious as it could have been and for that I am grateful. 

Thank you Lord for this. 

My Weight

For the past few years, I have really been struggling with my weight. I have gained a lot of weight in the last 3 years. The initial weight gain was stress related (in the past three years, my father has had a heart attack, suffered renal failure, had a stroke and most recently had one of his toes amputated, my mother has had a couple of breakdowns, my brothers are...nuts and then there are my own things going on in my life). But I haven't really done much to try and get the weight under control. It's almost like I am in denial. I see pictures of me and I wonder "who's that cute fat girl", only to realize that it's me. I've got to do something about this and it starts now. 

I recently set a goal to lose 70lbs by May 1st. Yes, 7-0. Yes it seems like a lot of weight but I have a lot to lose. But more importantly than having a lot to lose, I have so much more to gain. And I owe it to myself, my husband (yes, I said husband - no, there isn't something that I didn't tell you), my children and grandchildren, my friends and my family to be as healthy as possible for as long as possible. I started tracking my weight this week. Every morning before I get in the shower, I get on the scale. When I get to work, I plop the data into a spreadsheet. On Friday, I recently added two more sheets to the document, a food tracker and a activity tracker. 

So far, the weight tracker has been interesting because I think about my eating habits and how that translates to what's on the screen. So starting this week, I'm going back to planning my meals, making it a point to have breakfast, to sit down and cook dinner. I'm always amazed when I cook something and it tastes so good. But it's not like I can't cook, so I shouldn't be shocked. It's just that I don't. And when I do cook, it's either some sort of chicken, or spaghetti. But I'm about making changes now. And really trying to holding myself accountable. And it starts now. 

I'm not going to celebrate another birthday in this fat suit. It's not about looking good in a two piece on the beach. It's about feeling good when I put on jeans, it's about not being winded when I walk up a couple of flight of stairs. It's about getting rid of this flat patch on my ass and getting some sort of figure back. It's about recognizing more than just my face in my pictures. It's about a strong healthy heart, a life free from diabetes and heart disease which has plagued my family for so long. It's about living a long life, like my grandmother and my uncles. It's about taking care of me (first and foremost) and being there for others. I don't want to check out earlier than I have to. Therefore, it's time for me to take care of me and my weight.

A Failed Justice System

When I first started this post, it didn't have a title. I thought about it and I didn't just want to base this on the sentencing in the Oscar Grant trial, although it is somewhat motivated by it. For those of who you may not be aware of the Oscar Grant situation, Oscar Grant was a young man in the Bay Area who was "accidentally" killed by a transit officer who claims he was reaching for his taser and reached for his gun instead, while Grant was faced down and handcuffed on the ground. The transit officer, Johannes Mehserle, was convicted of involuntary manslaughter and was sentenced to two years in prison with time served. Without getting into too many more details about the trial, the case and it's impact on me, I do want to say that we live in a time where justice is rarely served. 

Help me understand this folks: Johannes Mehserle received two years with time served for shooting an unarmed man on New Years' Eve 2009

Michael Vick, NFL Quarterback, received a 21 month prison sentence and a suspension from the NFL for DOG fighting.

Plaxico Burress, former NFL wide receiver, received a 2 year prison sentence for shooting HIMSELF. 

Ben Roethlisberger, NFL Quarterback, has seen his fair share of high profile problems off the field - a near fatal motorcycle accident, and sexual assault allegations in 2008 and 2010 which led to no criminal charges being filed but a 4 game suspension from the NFL. 

Now I know it's not right to just pick on celebrities and their legal troubles (luckily I didn't pick on white b list druggies) but I use these four examples to make a point. We live in a time where our justice system continues to fail us. I don't know if it's only in America, but why is it that what Michael Vick did so much more vicious than what Johannes Mehserle did? Now I am not an animal person, but I believe an animal's life can't be more precious that a human life. That may sound controversial that may not be PC, but I don't believe a man should have to serve more jail time for killing a dog than killing someone else. I'm not saying that you shouldn't value an animal's life, I just can't wrap my head around an animal's life being valued more than a human life. After Michael Vick served his time and lost millions of dollars, people are still hounding him (no pun intended) about him and the dogfighting. In my best Allen Iverson voice, "we're talking about dogs...not people, but dogs." GTFOH....

Plexiglass - that dumb ass fool deserves to be in jail for shooting himself, there's no question about that. But he "accidently" shot himself and got two years in prison - not with time served. Yes he endangered the lives of many, but this dumb ass is basically in jail for shooting himself. He may get out for "good behavior" but he's still a dumb ass...

Ben - all I can do is shake my head at him. I believe he has so much potential as an athlete but he makes some of the dumbest choices. But it also looks like even in making those choices, he gets bailed out. And that's unfortunate. I believe most people won't learn the lessons they should learn if they keep getting bailed out and told "okay just don't do it again". 

So what does all this mean? I feel like the justice system, like a lot of systems in America may have an agenda against the African American male. I believe if the situation in the Oscar Grant case had been reversed, the verdict would have been different but the outcome would have been the same. I don't know what we can do to change it. What I do know is that we live in a time with a failed justice system.